SpiritMaa

i asked for dream guidance about whether it was spiritually safe for me to travel to new orleans, and here's what happened in the dreamtime... i find myself in a room with a large group of people. sitting on the floor... darkish walls, dusky lighting... it seems we are getting ready for some sort of ritual. i start to go into trance, start to 'draw down' the spirit. i qualify 'only beings of greatest love...' and the one who shows up is mary erzulie - who i am very comfortable with - and my body starts to vibrate and undulate with her energy... i realize however, that the ritual hasn't started yet, so in order to be respectful, or to be 'in sync' with the others, i pull back on 'channeling' her... the facilitator, a black woman, comes over to me and i explain what happened. she wants to know the details, lies next to me, and we start to do breathing exercises...

when i wake up after the dream, i am surprised, because i know that erzulie is from the santeria or voodun tradition, but i don't have any experience with her, in fact have avoided her and this tradition up to now... however, because of my comfort level with her in the dream, i feel like i have received the go-ahead, or the 'blessing' to travel to new orleans ...

also find out, when i look her up online, that in the voodou tradition, erzulie has many forms, and that 'mary-erzulie' (aka erzulie freda) is actually one of the various erzulie 'loa'. this one has to do with sexuality and love, pleasure and riches - she is called virgin (like mary) not because she doesn't have sex (she does - with three husbands and numerous lovers :), but because the ultimate love she is drawn to is a higher love... also she can be disappointed/sad when the earthly reality of love doesn't always measure up to 'higher love....'

her sister erzulie dantor is related to the black madonna of czestochowa (poland - my ancestry - i know this madonna (!).. and got associated with erzulie when this madonna's image was brought to haiti - she has marks on her cheek - said to be scarred from battle, fierce protector of women. erzulie freda (the first one) is specifically from the louisiana voodun tradition, and either she or erzulie dantor are the patron saint of new orleans(!)...

interesting that the erzulie of sexuality and pleasure came to me in the dream and not the warrior side of this goddess (considering my relationship with kali - although kali IS multivalent - warrior,mother, lover...) does this aspect of the goddess/loa showing up relate to what my experience will be like in new orleans? if so, this is remarkable - that dream guidance is starting to answer my waking time questions so directly....thank you dream guides!

as i placed a ring of fire around me to create safe space, and called in the beings of greatest love, i started breathing through my heart where the white apophyllite crystal was resting... i heard a message to clean this crystal, which i resisted briefly, until the pressure increased and i started to feel uncomfortable... then i acquiesced and lit some incense, passing the crystal repeatedly through the smoke.... no more problems after that, however, strangely, the crystal seemed to be working my crown rather than my heart chakra... as i meditated for the wave of peace to overcome the waves of violence on the planet, there were no intense emotions - rather i felt very trancy, floaty, like my head was about to pop off.... when i started seeing images in front of me, i found myself chanting 'only beings of greatest love' over and over... spaciness and head expansion continued... then a small man with a broad face and a bandana across his forehead flashed in front of me - laughing and pointing at my head (or me)... when i got over my surprise, i started chanting to protective goddess energies... and then i asked who that was... i got the name of a mayan elder very slightly known to me... when i later saw his face on the computer, i said to myself, yes - that was him! but what was his message to me? and how did this happen? is he related to the apophyillite crystal i was meditating with? and why now - why not when i visited mayan ruins in the 90's? since his message is about the mayan cycles of time, maybe it will all become clear...with time

Kali, in your tribal form, present you are in the prehistory of India. Kali, in your early fierceness, present you are in the sacred scriptures of India. You rise to prominence in the Sakta tradition, and you come to power as Mahavidya in the Tantric tradition. You we see in your divine yogini attendants, and in your human yogini practitioners. You, Ma, in the cosmic kundalini that manifests on all levels of creation – universe, world, nature, the coiled serpent energy at the base of our spines. In your form as goddess in the chakras. You we see in the sexual path of liberation. You, Kali Ma, in the Bhakti path of love…in your bliss-intoxicated devotees... You, the dark one, Kali. Awesome power...

You who have impelled this journey, you who have called from the beyond. You who have moved across transpersonal realms, realms of the goddess and Tantric realms, what has been your purpose? You who have shown yourself in breathwork, dreams and meditation – why are you here? Have you come to help me identify my personal myth? Have you come to help me embrace my shadow? Have you come to help me deconstruct my cultural overlay as a woman? Have you come to give purpose to my fierce energies? Have you come to show me how to channel my power? Have you come to call me into my own chaos? Have you come to give name to my mystical, heart opening experiences? Have you come to bring guidance to my dreams? Have you come to initiate me? Have you come to take away my fear of death? Have you come to show me how to be spiritual warrior? Have you come to show me I am safe? Have you come that I may know love? Have you come to show me I am ‘all that?’

From out of the body, the psyche, the collective unconscious, the void – as kundalini, ally, archetypal energy, goddess, cosmic creatrix – you, the dark one, Kali. You arise. You who have manifested in this time and place. You who have been here forever... Is it you that speaks in the many faces of the dark mother around the world? Is it you that rises to challenge the patriarchy?? Is it you that calls us to raise the Energy? Is it you that calls us back from the brink? You, the dark one, Kali, awesome power...

magdalena maa - are you the one that was companion of yeshua, the one he kissed on the lips as the gnostic gospels describe? was it true you were trained in the ancient goddess traditions that surrounded the hebrews in canaan? were you the one that initiated christ with your menstrual blood into the sacred sexual path? magdalena maa - did you annoint him with oil, as the sacred kings were once annointed by the temple priestess? did you stand with him through his suffering and dying, holding the ground of being with the other women at the foot of the cross?

first one at the tomb, did you help re-member him, as isis with osiris - and help him rise again magdalena maa? did you flee with the 'holy grail' to the south of france - bringing the daughter, the dark one, sara-la-kali - and there continue his bloodline? are you - pictured naked with only your long hair as garmet and skulls at your side - really the link to the dark mother - the one who calls to us in the black madonnas all over europe? magdalena maa - tantric yogini, priestess of easter mysteries - today we honor YOU!....

what does it mean when you are at the beach, watching the waves break on the shore, the sun playing through the clouds, and you feel moved to start chanting to the sun and the sea. the qero/quechua words for father sun and mother sea are in your mind and on your tongue....inti taita, mamacocha, inti taita, mamacocha, inti taita, mamacocha.... as you chant, you feel a shift at the base of your spine, you feel your body vibrating, your head expanding, your heart filling up... you feel the focus of the energy pulling you towards the sun...inti taita, inti taita, inti taita... your head keeps expanding, your heart keeps filling... the sun keeps pulling your attention...as if - as if the earth's own personal star being is calling you, opening you, shifting something in you... could it be that the galactic alignment of the central galaxy sun with the earth's sun on december 21st, 2012 opened up a channel of energy you are tapping into? could it be that the qero initiations are opening you up as a conducter of energy between earth and sun-star? or is it the 'little sun' within you, as the qero believe, greeting and aligning with the energy of the 'big sun?'

sitting in a circle, we close our eyes... and follow the tone and follow our breath into center - place of inner guidance, inner wisdom, inner love... visualizing the sparkling energy at our core, we breathe deeply into it, and sending it around the circle, energy rises and a circle of safety is created... silently we focus again on the breath, letting it take us deeper and deeper into meditation... time out of time... we breath into our hearts... calling in beings of greatest love to surround us. goddess love, star being love, angel love, spirit guide love surround us. father sun, mother earth, mother ocean, fairy love, crystal love assist us. the energy raises higher and higher. hearts expanding, tears falling the power of big love rises exponentially... then - the tone chimes again, and we call out into in the center of the circle the vision we wish to see in the world... i see a world in which all beings come back into balance with the earth! i see a world in which the oceans are clear again!... i see a world where the power of love is greater than the power of war! i see a world in which all are honored for the gifts they bring!.... and then.... we connect with all people of open heart in the city.... with people of open heart all across the country... with people of open heart all around the world... with all beings of greatest love... and then - and then... together we send this energy out across the planet! together we send waves of big love winging out around the globe... we breath and we breath and we breath.... back into center... back into our hearts... back into our bodies... we thank the spirits. we ask that all sentient beings benefit from this energy... we open our eyes...

I had been with them two other times, and had been working with Ma Kali as my inner guru since 2000, but Amma and Swami didn't know that (or did they? :)) ...The vibrations began when Amma started chanting the first night, and when Swami touched my forehead. Then the next day, as we chanted to raise the energy for Goddess to come into the yantra, my involuntary bodily vibrations increased - exponentially. As I watched Amma channeling the goddess, my own kundalini energies were further triggered... I tried to hold 'beginner's mind' as I contemplated what might happen next....As I stepped into the yantra I felt a sort of emotional force-field - my heart opened - and as I prostrated myself to Ma in the center, I went into surrender. When I felt Amma touch my forehead, for a second there was nothing... and then... and then... my body was electrified, my arms started moving of their own accord, my head started shaking, and sounds started coming out of my mouth. The Goddess was moving through me! Jai Maa - Pratyangira Ma, Kali Ma, Amma Adi Shakti, Swami - All in service to the Mother!

more happening with the q'ero master shamans from the andes... continued similarities with the tantric path: despacho.mandala work, and what feels like shaktipat initiations... unification of masculine and feminine, honoring of pachamama (mother earth) and inti taita (the sun behind the sun).... prophecy of the eagle (north) and condor (south) flying together now - unification of head and heart... the apus (mountains) as gateways for interdimensional (dragon) beings from the pleiades, who seeded lemurian culture... the earth passes around the milky way galaxy every 26,000 years and into the vibrational field of the grand central sun... shifts consciousness here on the planet... last time around was lemuria - then 1/2 way around was atlantis... now we are moving into the fifth passing while humans here - fifth sun/fifth level of consciousness... we all have a chance to jump levels when the poles shift.... like the hopi, qero's say three days of darkness will come - stay inside, you can't bring anyone across this time - it's an individual choice.... anytime between now and 2014/2015... know your community, know your food, know your water... seeds will be gold....

i was surprised at the tantric elements of the peruvian q'ero shamanic retreat i attended recently.  first clue was the crystal skull present in the opening ritual.  another clue came during the despacho ceremony.  first we breathed our intention into plant leaves, then spoke them out loud to the master shamans, then watched as they placed the leaves and flowers in circular form in order to integrate all the groups' prayers and intentions.  red flowers on one side, and white flowers on the other [similar to colors associated with the masculine and feminine in tantric practicies]. all at once i realized what i was looking at: a tantric flower/leaf mandala!  another clue were my energetic reactions to the limpias (energetic clearing), and my intense emotional reaction to the initiations we received.  when the shaman blew into my head, and then into my hands, my body started vibrating, and my heart was overflowing - there i was with tears streaming down my face.  and just in case i had any doubts, a few weeks later i had a dream in which the female and male master shamans appeared together, demonstrating tantric sacred sexual practices... i have always had a strong resonance with the research that indicates tantric practices in india originally came from the matriarchal shamanic tribes, and now i have direct experience of the links between these two traditions!  

off to alaska again on that magic ship - the ship that seemed to remember me sun peeking through the fog on the way up, mountains welcoming us on both sides as we come into victoria...after sampling local art, saying hi to mount baker, and watching ravens chasing a bald eagle across the sky -- the ship heads out again into the mystic, setting sun over rising fog bank.... wind whipping across deck, alone at the front of the ship, i spread my arms in a kate winslet move and offered myself to the sea...

light playing over the water, shadows dancing on the waves... whales spouting off both sides of the ship... soon we are back in juneau, and the beautiful blue glacier, humpback whales tale slapping - baby whales showing us their faces, orcas in a pod swimming all around us. bald eagles on the shore hanging out. the wind whipping on the back of the boat, i stare at the snow capped mountains and whisper: i'm back!

next day glass-smooth light green tinted glacier bay... rounded tree topped mountains with moving brown bear dots the sun is out - again! and vista after vista of stunning white/ brown/green earth beauty lays itself out in front of us... glaciers curving down the mountain, glacier ridges, glaciers calving... mountain spirit faces in the patterned snow - twin peak glaciers that stun in their majesty.... white humpback whales breaching over and over again as we glide out of the bay. jumping for joy later that night, this time their dark side showing... pink sunset over the mountains/moon rise in the still blue sky... waking dream of totem poles standing in the sea -- the ancient real time/current spiritual center of the native people...

next a small town with a dramatic mountain/harbor backdrop filled with white houses, mystical masks and good mood shamanic artists making aurora goddesses and whimsical totems: haines. as we pull out i stare up at the mountains on both sides dwarfing the ship and see another whale tail ... leaving the snow topped northern peaks behind, we are soon back in the seldom sunny creek-street town of ketchikan - salmon still spawning in the creek, beautiful fur-doll spirits in the streets. the energy of the ancient totem poles blows my mind once again.... as we pull out of the final small town tucked between mountain and sea, i watch the sun dancing on the water over/around/beyond the endless islands of the good- mood shamanic inland passage, and feel complete.....